I will never forget the day I received the letter that every woman who has been for a routine mammogram dreads. I was called back to undergo a further scan as they found something that looked suspicious. I had noticed that my left nipple was starting to go inverted slightly – but it had been this way for about a year and up until then had not paid it much attention.  However, I now began to get very worried.  I put a brave face on it for my husband’s sake, but I remember sitting in my garden after I received the letter, looking around at all the flowers in bloom and wondering if I would still be here to see them all again the following year.

I had good reason to feel so pessimistic.  My daughter had died when she was only 20, just two months into her chemotherapy treatment for Non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma in 1996, and this had been devastating. One of my older sisters had died after her treatment for breast cancer in 1990 and my dad had also died after he was operated on for stomach cancer in 1981. A good friend of mine had died as well after they tried to burn her breast cancer away with radiotherapy 10 years before, so I was not feeling very confident about any of the medical treatment options that were open to me.

I consoled myself with the thought that perhaps treatments had improved since then and decided to put it out of my mind until my appointment came around. On the day of the appointment, I remember very clearly that the second time my left breast was placed in the machine (they could not get a clear picture the first time), I felt a sharp pain that made me cry out when the plates squeezed together.  It remained throbbing for several hours afterwards.  After this, I had another scan – this time with an ultrasound – and then a needle biopsy to take some of the cells from the area.

Everyone was very caring and kind, and at the end of all these tests I was told I did indeed have breast cancer. The biopsy site was dressed and I rejoined my husband out in the waiting room.  One look at me was enough to realise that the worst possible scenario had happened.  We went for a walk through the park as I could not face being around people, and we talked about my appointment with the consultant in a few days’ time.  I was trying to put a brave face on it and decided not to tell my daughter or anyone else until I got my head around it. I was numb at this stage, but still pinned all my hopes on cancer treatments being more advanced.  After all, hadn’t I heard so many stories from the media about all the various breakthroughs?  

Next week, Sue discusses her feelings as she received bad news about the treatment options for her cancer.

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SUSAN INSOLE, BSYA (N Th.) is a former NHS nurse and is now a nutritional therapist in the field of natural health.  She worked in a health care setting for 16 years, firstly in the field of rehabilitation and then as a welfare officer and secretary within a hospital setting.  She was also an advisor for weight loss in 2001 - 2003. She achieved a diploma in 2006 for nutritional therapy. She is the author of a downloadable eBook, What Works in Health. Her website is: www.naturalhealthbenefits.com